Thursday, September 6, 2012

3 months

I cannot believe it has been three months since I got back from India. Three months in which I have dwelled on the experiences I had. Three months in which not a lot has changed. I went on a mission trip, and I expected my whole life to change, and yet, as much as I wish it did, it didn't. My heart changed more than I could ever explain, and yet my life, to someone outside looking in, looks exactly the same. I play golf; I go to youth group; I am attentive in school; I am kind, caring, and considerate, yet I pick fights with the people I care about most; I am still ungrateful for what I have.

That is the hardest thing for me to swallow of all. Let's face it; I am very spoiled. My room is full of things I don't need. The cupboards are always full, my refrigerator keeps things cold, I have an extensive movie collection AND a really nice TV to watch them on. I have at least 15 pairs of shoes, when I can only logically wear one pair at a time. I promised myself that I would never again be ungrateful for what I have, and yet I came home, and I went right back to being spoiled. Every morning, I go through a routine that shows that I am blessed beyond belief. I debate over which pair of pants matches my shirt the best, when there are people who only have one pair of pants. I debate over what pair of shoes to wear, when other people work barefoot. I ponder which bow would look the cutest in my hair, while girls in other countries cry because all their hair was cut off. I skip breakfast, because I can, while children go without it while their stomachs rumble, just like they did yesterday... and the day before that. I complain about teachers and homework and school, when there are people who don't get to go to school, and would love to. I complain about reading a book and writing a paper for English class, while other people find jobs that require neither, because they never had the opportunity to learn how.

I have so many blessings in my life, and I have only noticed them in the last three months. The least I can do is be thankful for what I have, be grateful for what God has blessed me with.